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When Color Doesn't Matter

I love her!

Who?

Esther!

Truth is, I would dress up as Queen Esther on Purim but I just am not into the cross- dressing thing. The Rema in Shulchan Aruch says that it is halachically permitted on Purim for a man to dress up as a woman but this Rema is very problematic and many argued with him on this point. And frankly, even if it were permitted I still wouldn't. It is just not my style. But I am still a major fan. She came in the clutch. She took control! Then she disappeared into the background in the spirit of the modest Jewish woman. When needed she will do anything to help but when her job is completed she will fade modestly into the horizon. Ego inflation, self-aggrandizement - not our heroine! Her very name means "hidden". The holiest things are hidden - the Holy of Holies, our souls and Hashem himself. [See Maharal Nesiv Hatzniyus]

One noteworthy point about Esther. Chazal say that she wasn't physically appealing! She had sort of a greenish complexion and wasn't, naturally speaking, such a pleasure to look at. Men like their money to be green - not their women.... Yet Achashveirosh chose her over all of the other women. Why?? Achashveirosh wanted a Beis Yaakov girl?

Well, in a sense, yes. Some of the other woman were externally more beautiful but Esther possessed a special quality that they all lacked - charm, known as chein [2/15]. EVERYBODY liked her. You couldn't help it. In modern hebrew they say "maksima". Esther was super-duper maksima. Now remember, Achashveirosh was a hairy disgusting monster. According to Chazal he was thrilled with Haman's plan. Nazi! Hamas! Techinah! And Esther had to be intimate with him. Yichee!! Gross! Yet Esther overcame her extreme feelings of revulsion and remained the most pleasant person to be around. She probably had a kind word and a smile for everybody. Why? Because she knew that she was part of G-d's plan and she was determined to be the best possible emissary. Yes, even though she would rather have been elsewhere, to say the least.

The lesson for us: Whatever situation we are in we must be pleasant and kind to all. Just because we might be suffering doesn't mean we must inflict our pain upon others.
Esther was able to overcome her natural feelings because she had a sense of mission. We also have a mission. To be kind, compassionate and loving to all - even when we are not in the mood.

I give ALL OF US a bracha that we should be equal to the task - Amen ken yehi ratzon!!

Love and blessings!!!!


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Segula - 40 days at the Kotel

About me

  • I'm Rabbi Ally Ehrman
  • From Old City Jerusalem, Israel
  • I am a Rebbe in Yeshivat Netiv Aryeh.
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